Chapter 5

 

Before I get back to my story, I thought I would copy this very interesting post that I came across three years ago on some obscure message board. Josh had performed with Beyonce at the Academy Awards in February, 2005. I have no idea who XOXO is, but this is just an example of the kinds of posts that were all over the place at the time (even on Josh’s boards, before a Mod would delete them.) I wasn’t the only person speaking up, but people sure did portray things that way (and still do). The following post was made a couple of months before I was banned from FOJG….


If only you knew what is happening in his life right now you wouldn’t be so hard on Josh. He had good reason to be nervous that night and it’s a good thing Beyonce was there to ease an otherwise difficult situation. The reason why Beyonce got to sing at all was because she was the default performer in Josh’s stead just in case he didn’t show. Josh had to cancel TWO concert performances to make a rehearsal and the show. But he held out at the last minute for another reason and that was to try and dodge his “sort of my g/f” who took it upon herself to show up uninvited to the gig. All the while Josh was looking forward to spending the evening with only his brother, mom and dad. Instead what he got was a “sort of my g/f” who kept butting into every damn interview and photo opt belonging to Josh and his brother. She was very cold and rude, whoever she was. Josh would do VERY, VERY well to get rid of “it” and get another one who is better suited. I’m surprised that his management hasn’t done something about this. I thought her actions were what most people call “stalking". Comment by XOXO — 3/15/2005 @ 5:22 am  



So getting back to my story…

 

My banning from FOJG, horrible emails sent about me by Josh’s “people”, and scathing attacks by fellow Josh fans certainly rattled me at the end of May 2005 and the beginning of June. But more baffling and upsetting events were still to come. In the meantime, intense debate continued in the IMDB board about everything from my banning and the nature of the message boards to Josh's career. There is much discussion about the "Board Police" and many “fans” come out of the woodwork to attack me as a person, calling me such things as a "psychotic". One lovely person posts that January’s “reality” is that she is beautiful and living a wonderful life being Josh Groban’s girlfriend, whereas my reality is that I am “fat, ugly and living in bumsquat Texas”.  I was quite shocked by these incredible posts—but also somewhat amused. People claimed that I was going to be sued for slander or carted off to the mental hospital. My favorite post was by someone telling me that the LAPD was going to come after me and that my “mug shot” was going to be all over the internet within a few months. Well, the police have yet to show up at my door, and last time I did a search on my name, no mug shots popped up. As far as somebody trying to sue me, I think people need to look up the definition of “slander”. I did, because I knew little about the law, and the definition is: “communication of false statements injurious to a person's reputation.” If I say that I don't like January's behavior or comment on her photos, that is NOT slander. I never made up lies about things January has done. So clearly I never “slandered” Miss Jones—nor anyone else. Pointing out what she HAS done is not slander. And if saying that you don’t like a particular celebrity’s behavior is slander, then about half the people in the world could be sued for slander. So if anybody has been slandered it is ME. Making claims that I have mental problems, accusing me of being a stalker, claiming that I did illegal file sharing or posted illegal videos, and accusing me of being the Ezboard hacker are all false statements or statements that are “injurious to my reputation”. 
 

But I sure wasn’t going to sue anyone. Even though I remain quite upset and alarmed by what has happened, when horrible people have attacked me, I have always decided that the best thing to do is to try to concentrate on the positive. And in May 2005, I decided to focus on making pillows for Josh's charity.


In a thread on the IMDB board on June 11th, 2005, I end a post with the comment that I'm heading to the fabric store and I said: "I have to make some pillows for the Grobanites for Charity 4th of July auctions!" I went to the fabric store and bought $65.00 worth of trim for new Josh pillows for the upcoming auction and other events. I returned home and checked my email and I was stunned to read an email from Valerie, who heads up “Grobanites for Charity” at www.grobanitesforcharity.org, which said: "We appreciate the pillows that you have donated to the charity fundraisers in the past. We know that your heart is in the right place to help raise money for the charity, but we cannot accept your pillows for the charity projects anymore. I'm sorry." I was absolutely devastated at this news, as I had made over 200 pillows for Josh’s charity in the past, and not only did I love making them, I also loved knowing that I was helping out in some way. I asked Valerie for an explanation and I was told that certain people were "not pleased with what is going on." Well, you know what??  I was not "pleased" either!!

What is completely baffling to me is: what in world does my donations of pillows to Josh’s charity have to do with me speaking out about anything? (If that is what Valerie was talking about.) Of course, there is no logical reason for such a decision. First of all, I don’t have to like everyone around Josh to be his fan. Secondly, 99% of the people who would buy or win a donated pillow don’t have any idea who I am. Third, even if they DO know me and know about my views, I would guess that more than likely they wouldn’t CARE about that, because it has nothing to do with a Josh pillow. To me, to reject donations to Josh’s charity just because the one who is donating isn’t “liked” is…is….well, I can’t even think of a word to describe it. It just blows my mind that someone could even consider that action. It seems to be a deliberate attempt to hurt me. What else could it be? But I will get over it eventually. And the saddest thing is that it is Josh’s foundation that is hurt in the end, by getting less money. But I guess this person who banned my pillows, whoever it is, doesn’t care about that...

Note about Valerie: I am not angry at her at all. I know she is not the one who made the decision about my pillows –she was just the one who had to give me the message. I think she has done great work for Josh’s charitable causes and she is one of his most loyal fans.

Now, getting back to my “banning story”… in August 2005, I was looking at the main login page of FOJG and noticed the “renew your membership” buttons. On a whim, I clicked to renew my second-year membership and was surprised to see that it accepted my username and password! So I went ahead and renewed, charging the fee to my credit card. I was SO thrilled that they were letting me back in, because I was one of the first ones to signup there. I was the 24th person to sign up on the first day FOJG went into existence. To have my username back was wonderful. Well, only two days later I tried to logon and got the “account disabled” message again. This was completely baffling to me, since I hadn’t posted ANYTHING negative at ALL. I asked for an explanation and Dan said that “FOJG found that previous conduct from an account in my name was “inconsistent” with the intent of Josh’s web site”. So they were refunding my credit card on Thurs, 8/25/05.

“Conduct inconsistent  with the intent of Josh’s web site”??? Boy, I can think of a LOT of fans who have done that, and THEY are still posting in FOJG!!

Next chapter…. The “Josh Groban Uncensored Corner Pub” is born!!